Popular Demand

So I am not satisfied by this picture, but I don't know if I could ever like a photo of myself.  (Although my sophomore photo came the closest.)  I don't even like my wedding pictures.  But since I went ahead and talked about my drastic hair cut I thought I owed you a photo.  This is my hair just scrunched.  I am satisfied with the length of my hair but was hoping for less of a bob and more of a dramatic cut.  Maybe in a few months.

Nope, I just couldn't do it. Deleted!   I think the older I get the worse my self esteem gets.  Even with all my weight loss I cannot stand to look at my own photos. 

Birthday Fun

I have never ever ever said I could decorate cakes.  When it comes to butter and sugar I think presentation is overrated.

I always like it when birthdays are the same.  It must be the seven year old inside of me but I love matching birthdays.  My mom and my cousin Katie Jo share a birthday, along with the late Micheal Jackson.  George Clooney and I are soul mates on May 6th.  Max's girlfriend Claudia and my sister Suzy share a special day.  As much as I love my brother-in-law Mark I still think Krista was meant for our Omaha bishop's son Eric who had the same day as her.  So I was happy to learn my cousin Grace had her first child today on Max's birthday.  He now has a b-day buddy.  So congrats to Grace and Jason on their new baby Clark.  I am going to assume that he was named after Clark Grizwald from my favorite Holiday movie, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.  (I am sure he isn't but that's what I will always think and smile about.)

6 years old

0

1

2

3

4

5

6

Max will be 6 in the morning.  While it usually isn't too fun to have your birthday fall on a Sunday, we are determined to make him feel special.  We went to a special family lunch today at McDonald's per Max's request.  He got a cheeseburger happy meal with only meat and cheese.  No healthy ketchup or pickles for him.  Then he went to Walmart and picked out some toys using Grandma Tobler's birthday money.  We finished off the day making a poster, because Max is the "Bearcat of the week," at school next week.  Jeff and I are going to join him for lunch on Monday, and there will be a bowling birthday party next Saturday.  Not too shabby.  I love my little guy.  He is such a blessing to us and amazingly gets better with age.  Today he not only came rushing to Spikey's aid with a stuffy, but he also collected Mae and started a game of Candy Land with her all on his own.  What a doll. 

High Expectations

Jeff and I got away for a day and night.  He took a Friday off and we drove to Kansas City for the night.  About 3.5 hours away, Kansas City is a great city just North of us and now that they have a temple we have a legitimate excuse to go, "We're on a mission from God."  We hired a baby sitter for Spike, and had friends watch Mae and Max.  I was a bit apprehensive about leaving Max after only two days of school but he had a great time with his friend Jackson.  I will admit that I had high expectations for this trip.  We really needed to get away.  (So far this has been our longest stretch of 28 hours away!)  I suspect that my overly high expectations were what led to this trip being a let-down.  Things did not go great, they weren't disastrous, but it wasn't the trip I needed or wanted.  I'll spare you the long recap and give the points of interest

The hotel was not as nice as the money I shelled out for it.
Our room was surrounded by three families with kids.
It was hot and muggy.
We got lost and almost missed the temple.
Some ladies were laughing and talking during the entire session.
No good shopping.

But the Cheesecake Factory didn't disappoint and we also had fun going out last min, really late at night to eat at a bar.

I don't think we will try to get away again without some parent or relative offering to take the kids for free.  I think a big part of my stress was how much the stupid little trip cost me to not have fun.  But the most interesting thing about the trip was what happened when I got home. 

Having checked back in with everyone I learned that so many people had had a much worse weekend then me.  It really put things in perspective for me and made me appreciate that the trip wasn't a total loss.  I have actually been feeling a lot better these past two weeks so in effect I got what I needed out of the trip and I guess that is all that matters.

 

Put in his Place

I have a headache and don't want to get up and be productive; so blogging it is.
Poor Spikey, Mae is so mean to him.  All day long she messes with him and hurts him.  I have seen her walk past him in the hall and push him down, for no reason whatsoever.  She takes everything he has away from him, she throws stuff at him.  She liked to pull his hair so we had to get it cut.  She is really quite mean.  I suspect that she is just showing him who is boss. It isn't just at home either, the fitness center day care lady said Mae is mean to him there.  Every time the lady turned away Spike was climbing up on the table trying to get away from Mae.  The disturbing part is that she didn't learn this behavior from anyone.  Max has always been overly nice to her and he adores Spike.  Nope this sociopathic behavior is all her.....

Hello Friend!

We just got back from our Sunday walk and on the path we passed a gaggle of small children.  Mae hopped out of the stroller and walked over to the two girls of the group, took their hands, and said, "Hello friend."  Yeah it was pretty cute.

Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes

Last Christmas I weighed more then I have ever weighed without being pregnant.  It was tough to be so big; tough for my self esteem and tough for my wardrobe.  For the first time I had to shop in the XL size and the 14 was just too tight.  It wasn't good or pretty.  So I started running and dieting.  My goal has been to just keep going.  Whatever happens; if I have a bad day, or even a sick week, I get back on the wagon as soon as possible.  To date I have lost over 25 pounds and over 4 inches off my waist.  Currently I am still in a size 14, but with the belt cinched in to keep them up.   The progress is slow, but it is steady and I continue to tweak things as needed.  I run twice a week at the gym now instead of outside.  I miss my running buddies, but I don't really like running and am not gonna do it in 100+ weather.  I get in at least 2-3 days of Chalean weights a week.  I purchased 15lbs weights a few months back and love using them.  I have to brag that my shoulders look amazing.  It makes me want to wear sleeveless shirts cause my shoulders are beautiful.  I have always been blessed to carry very little of my fat on my arms, (it all hangs out lower down south,) but now they are looking crisp.  My abs need a little help so August is now ab month.  They are my focus and I am doing these little ab exercises daily.  I also have a goal of stopping with the soda, but that isn't going too well.  I know that I really need to kick up my cardio if I want to get to my ideal weight, but that would take a great time commitment which I am just not ready to do right now.  But as of today I am smaller then I have been since before I was pregnant with Mae.  I am wearing clothes that I haven't worn in years and I am encouraged to keep going, which is the most important part. 

No before or after pictures cause I hate taking pictures of myself.  Even if lose all the weight I will still be burdened with self esteem issues about my other features.